born in 1983 i was a man of simple tastes

my parents were a rocket launcher and a bengal tiger, artificially insemination hath brought a degenerate with a terrible sense of humor with no tact nor compassion


i have two sisters, one is the indian ocean the other is an anthropologist who lives in savannah georgia

i am an industrial engineer which means i craft things out of metal
which is ironic considering i'm so fucking metal my dick fires out titanium chards jk ladies i can't cum

i drink a lot, i'm even typing this whilst betwixt alcoholic beverages i don't do drugs because they seem boring, unless you count pills... then i do lots of drugs

i have 53 tattoos and i'd rather have them all removed by a cheese grater than actually talk to you about any of them or respond to a "nice ink" comment

i'm a whiskey sipping gentleman, and by sipping i mean shots, and by gentleman i mean lush
i live in a suburb of boston which means that i have an irreproachable amount of prejudices
my favorite all time tv show is M*A*S*H*
i run a music website on the side
its widely successful, i blast animals with fire extinguishers in an effort to teach them a lesson
if you are reading this you either mistook my picture as one of an attractive gentleman OR i pissed you off in some way
in which case HAHAHA you're a dick and whatever you like sucks dick





I've given every thing I can.
There are no heroes left in man.